It's a gorgeous day out there, I've been to the gym and worked out, we had a productive, if long, board meeting last night, I've gotten a few votes in the blog awards competition, I'm not scheduled to leave for Vashon till tomorrow-----------I should be feeling pretty UP. And at least I'm not feeling down. But "blah" just doesn't cut it for me. And it doesn't usually produce a blog post, either.
But today it's going to.
I don't feel very interested in anything right now. And I'm not sure why. There's nothing serious enough in my life to actually worry about; there's nothing thrilling enough in my life to enthuse about; if anything, I feel tired of the same old, same old.
I was thinking about sermons this morning; I would like very much to increase my preaching schedule for the next church year. I think it would stimulate me to start caring more about what's happening in the world, rather than observing it all and sighing wearily.
What am I sighing wearily about these days? The presidential campaign which has already shifted into "what can we get this guy/gal saying on national TV that will get our viewers' attention?". The propensity of sane people to deny responsibility for stupid actions, whether they are national figures or local yokels. The endless arguments about climate change, some of which fly in the face of common sense, as in "quintupling the population of the planet has nothing to do with the extra greenhouse gases in the atmosphere".
And then there's Seattle's ongoing effort to deal with their traffic headaches in expensive and controversial ways. The ongoing east/west battle in the state of Washington, with the east side of the mountains being stubbornly conservative (not necessarily in a bad way) and the west side being stubbornly righteous about their liberal behavior (not necessarily in a bad way).
To say nothing of Exxon Mobil's immense profits in 2006, at the expense of the environment and the consumer. Or Congress' partisan conflicts over ideologies. Or Bush's babblings about how we can win in Iraq despite the growing wisdom to the contrary.
I guess I may have gone into "blah" mode to protect my sanity. Everything I've mentioned is worthy of a rant, but I just can't work one up. Molly Ivins always did it for me, but she's ahead of us all now, doing whatever the deceased do, wherever they do it. Or not. At least she's finished the book now; she knows the ending, whereas we do not.
So what is even slightly interesting to me right now? My island friends' stories about squirrels in the house. Training the cat not to yowl at the door to come in or go out (hah!). Checking the blog awards hourly. Wondering how much rent credit my landlord will give me because the basement is still in disrepair. (note: $600!)
And underneath it all is the beginning of an itch----to do a restart on my personal creativity and passion for this work. I think I have been so drained by winter's neediness that I need a resurrection. Maybe I'll go for a walk on the beach.