Friday, July 07, 2006

A dream to think about

Last night I had an interesting dream, which has stuck with me, as few do. It seems significant that it followed the huge relief I felt when I learned that my friend does not have cancer. I have not dreamed this dream before, but it seemed a little familiar.

I was attending some large assembly like G.A. and was with a couple of friends or perhaps my hotel roommates. We were walking along a sidewalk late in the day, hungry for supper; I suddenly found myself talking to a former boyfriend who looked quite frail and elderly (he actually died a couple of years ago of a heart attack). I was somewhat separated from my friends at this point and after hugging him, I decided to go to the hotel before dinner and drop stuff off, get cleaned up, whatever.

But though I found the hotel fine, I couldn't find the elevator. Or rather, I found one but a clerk was just shutting it down with an "out of order" sign. So I went looking for another one. All the elevators in this building seemed to be in remote, hidden corners, and difficult to find. I couldn't find one and was starting to get rather annoyed when I woke up.

This dream mystifies me. I can't find threads in it, a la the Jeremy Taylor Dreamwork process, though I do see that my former boyfriend had come back to life somehow which connects to my friend's reprieve from cancer. And yet it feels significant.

A la Jeremy, "If it were YOUR dream.........." what would be happening here?


MauKatt said...

If it were my dream, I'd read it as anxiety about death, and what happens after. You met your friend, who was elderly and frail -- obviously not long for the world. (You said in real life this friend was already dead.) You had been going to supper, which is a life-sustaining activity -- eating food which strengthens the body and continues life. Also, you had been going to eat with friends, but now you delayed the food and went to the hotel by yourself -- separating from your community and from people in general. You couldn't find the elevators (leading to your room, to the place that was yoru symbolic home in an otherwise strange building. The elevator rises up to this "home" place, but you are stuck in the empty strange building, and the way up, which you were certain you knew, is now elusive and hard to find. To wit -- I'm going to die, I'm going to die alone, and what if what I believed to be true about "home" and "safety" after death really isn't true? How can I find my way? ~Can~ I find my way?

Well... that's how I'd read it if it were ~my~ dream, at any rate....

ms. kitty said...

Thanks, St. Mau, that's helpful.

kim said...

If it were my dream, I'd think that not being able to find the elevator meant there was no fast way up -- I'd have to take the stairs. No shortcuts.

ms. kitty said...

Thanks, Kim, that's helpful.