Monday, February 28, 2011

So, on this dreary Monday morning....

which seems to want to keep us winterbound as long as possible, I decided to get out the new box of hair color I bought a week ago and refresh my wintry locks with a little jolt. It was a variety I hadn't used before but it was the same brand and it said something about covering the gray, so I went with it.

The product itself didn't seem like the product I'd used in the far away past, but I figured it was updated and continued to apply the pre-conditioner and then mix the color and then apply the color and then set the timer (30 minutes? the other stuff was 15---I hope this is okay!). Rinsing out the goo after 30 minutes, I noticed it had a slightly different color than the stuff I'd used before---darker, somehow, and .....what?!!

So----I'm now a strawberry blonde, for the nonce. It's a great color, it's just not something I'm used to. My normal hair color is light enough that the gray looks kind of blonde, when mixed in with the remaining blondish strands. (I refuse to use the term "dishwater blonde"; what an ugly description!) I haven't colored my hair for years, and six weeks ago when I used up an old box of hair color left over from those days, it didn't do anything unusual, just brightened up my look.

I've had the song "Why Not Me?" by the Judds looping through my mind for weeks, as I try to learn it for this Thursday night's gig, and when I woke up at 4 a.m. today, I thought it might be more than just a song I'm learning. I've come to understand that when a song might not go away and I wake up singing it, there may be a message there.

I have thought, all my life, about "why not me?", in an effort to understand how and why I am different from so-called "normal"---in good and bad ways. So I decided at 4 a.m. that today I am going to spend some time thinking and writing about the topic, because I have a feeling it's more meaningful than the lines of the song: "why not me on a rainy day, why not me to love your cares away, why not me?" Which is meaningful in its own way, as I think about somebody, but the question means so much more than that.

Heavens, it's a real blog post! Don't get used to it, though I may publish fragments of my "why not me?" thinking. The less-embarrassing ones, that is.

The reason I haven't posted much in recent months is that the issues I'm pondering are too personal to post. Nothing traumatic, just too easily identifiable as relating to people who read the blog. Not you, FS.

Hopefully the dry spell will pass and I'll be back at it. But you know, Facebook has drained off some of my need to write---there are such interesting articles and it's lots easier just to link to an article or share a quick comment than to actually compose something for the blog.

Also, I have noticed a distressing quality of impatience within myself and it makes it hard to tolerate dissenting opinions. Why not me, being patient? I'll let you know if I figure it out.

And why not me as a strawberry blonde? Hmmmm, that's a good question!


Lizard Eater said...

I look forward to the blog post, "How Ms. Kitty Got Her Groove Back."

Strawberry Blond seems like a great start. :) Post pics!

ms. kitty said...

I will, LE, if I get my iPhone figured out soon.

Mile High Pixie said...

Great post topic and philosophical concept, Rev Kit! "Why not me" is a topic I've thought about as the storm of the economy has passed. "Why not me" for a promotion? "Why not me" to take a break and let someone else do the work now and then? "Why not me" to sit down and take a break?

And I can't wait to see the new color!

ms. kitty said...

Thanks, Pixie, maybe I'll post a picture when I get the new iPhone figured out.

Leland said...

where is your gig on Thursday?

ms. kitty said...

We're going to be singing for the First Thursday gathering of the Holmes Harbor club at Freeland Hall, starting at 6 tonight. I think anyone can come and enjoy the meal/entertainment for a small admission price.

Lizard Eater said...

"Why not me?" kept nipping at my mind, trying to make me remember something.

Oh yes. The famous Marianne Williamson quote.

"Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us.

***We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be?***

You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It's not just in some of us; it's in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others."

ms. kitty said...

I love this quote by Marianne Williamson and do often need to apply it to myself! Thanks, LE.